Monday, January 04, 2010

Cow? What cow officer?

Oh...that cow.

Some people go for guerrilla gardening, but how many have ever tried guerrilla ranching? Apparently someone has because Miniwether and I found this delicious looking beast while we were secretly planting Jerusalem artichoke tubers in unused lots throughout our neighborhood.

Last spring I picked up six Jerusalem artichoke tubers at the local HEB Central Market and planted them in my backyard. Each tuber produced numerous stalks and a plethora of new tubers over the summer. They are best left in the ground until at least the first frost and really not until you are ready to use them. Well, we've already had several frosts and recent issues with food suggests now is a good time to act like a squirrel and go a little, I mean tuberish.

Tubers. They go great with squirrel.

The weather was cold and drizzly Sunday. Christmas decorations had been packed away. I had to return to work the next day after being off for nine days. In other words, it was time to go outside. Actually, I'd been planning to go out tuber-stashing earlier in my vacation, but like many other plans it didn't escape the crushing gravity of fatherhood. Oh well, I finally had a little time, plenty of tubers, and a willing partner in my dirty crime.

Miniwether strikes a blow for plantkind...which will later be eaten by humankind. You know that whole Circle of Life thing, but without the singing baboons.

We ended up planting the sunchokes throughout three empty, unused lots where hopefully they will prosper and multiply into abundant crops of life-sustaining calories! It was a good way to spend a dreary Sunday afternoon.

Adventure! Excitement! Inulin!

p.s. Yes, we did find a young cow while planting the tubers. I didn't bring it home though as Misseswether kind of freaked out the last time she saw me and a cow in the front yard. She started screaming, ran into the house and locked the door for protection. I'm not exactly sure why she thinks cows are capable of turning a doorknob, but she is a city girl and so I cut her some slack when it comes to understanding the technological capabilities of bovines.

p.p.s. To all you city-folk, cow hooves are incapable of turning doorknobs.

p.p.p.s. I suppose they could bust down a door pretty easily if they had some overwhelming desire to enter a house. I'm not sure why they would want to though.

p.p.p.p.s. Okay, one other thing. Do NOT lead a cow up several flights of stairs and into a friend's dorm room, no matter how funny you think this will be. Cows will go up stairs without much trouble but the only way to get them back down is to sedate it then carrying it down the stairs. The problem with sedating a cow is when you do so it loses control of its bowls. The result is very unpleasant, especially in a dorm room or hallway.

p.p.p.p.p.s. Unless it is your arch rival dorm, then it becomes really funny again.

1 comment:

Izzy G. said...

I like how she has pink gardening gloves. Lol.